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Burned cooter
Siren.Bungie
Server: Siren
Game: FFXI
Posts: 272
By Siren.Bungie 2009-01-22 00:18:55
Copied from another site~
ok this is what happening,
my parents are out with family friends, and theyll be back any minute so i need your help
see, i volunteer on my sister's softball team (im 22 the girls are 15)
and whatever, i met this girl, her name is Alison, and were going out for a while. We have a lot in common, and sometimes i help her with homework. i helped her with her english essay and she still got a D... this is because her teacher is a ***... anywayz
so she came over like an hour ago, and i really want to lose my virginity, so i ask her to have sex
"no no i cant, its not right" she said, but i told her "dont worry, i know what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus ill give you 2 n64 games if you say yes."
So then I gave her Diddy Kong Racing and Ken Griffy Jr. Baseball and we went up to my room. she is a bit confused and scared.
then i think to myself- yo i need lube, right? cuz i heard other people saying you need to lube up her clit otherwise it wont fit in properly.
ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my virginity, so i grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold and it wont melt, so i microwaved it for 8 minutes and i put it in a glass and poured it on her cooter, and now shes saying i burned it.
i dont know what to do, my parents are going to be back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz help you guys are really smart please help me.
any idea how to shut her up? should i give her another n64 game?
Pandemonium.Krebons
Server: Pandemonium
Game: FFXI
Posts: 170
By Pandemonium.Krebons 2009-01-22 00:23:38
wow... thats soooo wrong, and yet, sooooo funny. children... /sigh
Diabolos.Daddyx
Server: Diabolos
Game: FFXI
Posts: 63
By Diabolos.Daddyx 2009-01-22 00:24:59
O_oa
Pandemonium.Krebons
Server: Pandemonium
Game: FFXI
Posts: 170
By Pandemonium.Krebons 2009-01-22 00:32:17
wow i thought it said 8 seconds at first glance, but 8 minutes... what a genius.... apperently doesnt know what saliva is either x.x;
Server: Seraph
Game: FFXI
Posts: 990
By Seraph.Xdudemanx 2009-01-22 00:44:30
lol seriously?
Lakshmi.Uriko
Server: Lakshmi
Game: FFXI
Posts: 7
By Lakshmi.Uriko 2009-01-22 00:49:31
Sounds like a commonly asked question on Yahoo Answers >.> That site is a blast.....
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjD2OHdoU8De2o5gR1p_bwcjzKIX;_ylv=3?qid=20080615211914AAOKQ5Z
Leviathan.Crosis
Server: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
Posts: 83
By Leviathan.Crosis 2009-01-22 00:56:57
LMAO
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 2838
By Shiva.Artemicion 2009-01-22 01:02:26
Sounds like something from 4chan.
Server: Fairy
Game: FFXI
Posts: 5645
By Fairy.Xxnumbertwoxx 2009-01-22 01:26:27
Uriko said: Sounds like a commonly asked question on Yahoo Answers >.> That site is a blast.....
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjD2OHdoU8De2o5gR1p_bwcjzKIX;_ylv=3?qid=20080615211914AAOKQ5Z omfg that was funny :)
Server: Ramuh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 64
By Ramuh.Shadowarrior 2009-01-22 01:32:15
OMFG that was funny. wtf were u thinking? or u werent? AHAHA u shuda just gone into ur parents room :P dont u know where ur parents stash their porn?
Siren.Bungie
Server: Siren
Game: FFXI
Posts: 272
By Siren.Bungie 2009-01-22 02:01:20
atleast he didnt give her goldeneye~
Ragnarok.Rusko
Server: Ragnarok
Game: FFXI
Posts: 89
By Ragnarok.Rusko 2009-01-22 02:09:13
What
Ragnarok.Rusko
Server: Ragnarok
Game: FFXI
Posts: 89
By Ragnarok.Rusko 2009-01-22 02:09:17
The
Ragnarok.Rusko
Server: Ragnarok
Game: FFXI
Posts: 89
By Ragnarok.Rusko 2009-01-22 02:09:26
F*ck
Caitsith.Neonracer
Server: Caitsith
Game: FFXI
Posts: 2748
By Caitsith.Neonracer 2009-01-22 02:59:20
I'm so sorry, but didn't the mods say we had to moderate our own selves in this type of fashion?? I mean sry to jack this thread but I had a thread called Congradualtions on USA on your new PRes, and it gets locked?. I'm not whining guys, but do you honestly think this type of behavior should have been posted here??
Not game related....
sorry.
Siren.Bungie
Server: Siren
Game: FFXI
Posts: 272
By Siren.Bungie 2009-01-22 03:19:14
lol @ the /cry
Server: Garuda
Game: FFXI
Posts: 859
By Garuda.Littledarc 2009-01-22 06:29:44
i really don't want them to disable the use of forums but if you guys can't control yourselves you'll get banned and possibly ruin it for everyone else. seriously, this isn't allakazam. READ THIS!
Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 337
By Asura.Shamaya 2009-01-22 07:09:32
I would say throw in Mario Cart 64 and you can call it good.
Ramuh.Bekisa
Server: Ramuh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 182
By Ramuh.Bekisa 2009-01-22 07:17:35
wtf is wrong with you, I don't care if you're 15 and she is 15, you're going to ruin her last few years of her childhood just because you can't go .. never mind.
wtf, butter? Sounds like a real ladies man.
... wtf, 10 seconds? You in the rodeo?
hmm better yet, wtf this doing on a video game forum?
Ramuh.Jadell
Server: Ramuh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 64
By Ramuh.Jadell 2009-01-22 07:36:47
I agree Celelove, this was not game related and posting this was offensive and immature. Please exercise a little consideration as to the content before posting or at the least just post a like and indicate that it may be offensive material. Guaranteed to have more viewers just by stating it could be offensive.
Server: Gilgamesh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 551
By Gilgamesh.Cardinalgate 2009-01-22 08:17:23
this should be on the news sooner or later
Midgardsormr.Babak
Server: Midgardsormr
Game: FFXI
Posts: 1
By Midgardsormr.Babak 2009-01-22 08:41:24
HAHAHAHA BUTTER, ddouche XD i cant stop laughing omg omg omg hahaha BUTTER!!!!? HAHAHA may as well pulled out the peanut butter too HAHAHA
Server: Gilgamesh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 551
By Gilgamesh.Cardinalgate 2009-01-22 09:02:39
Babak said: HAHAHAHA BUTTER, ddouche XD i cant stop laughing omg omg omg hahaha BUTTER!!!!? HAHAHA may as well pulled out the peanut butter too HAHAHA how could anyone laugh to this real or fake?
Server: Odin
Game: FFXI
Posts: 1304
By Odin.Dirtyfinger 2009-01-22 09:15:09
We were all young once, but butter? why butter lol
Seraph.Zabini
Server: Seraph
Game: FFXI
Posts: 46
By Seraph.Zabini 2009-01-22 10:37:10
the first time i read this is didnt read the "Copied from another site~" lol XD
Caitsith.Neonracer
Server: Caitsith
Game: FFXI
Posts: 2748
By Caitsith.Neonracer 2009-01-22 10:52:30
It still goes on huh? Well idc.. The Mods will just pick the ppl off of their accounts one by one I suppose...
I don't want this site to close b/c of a few clowns who think they can post w.e and think they can get away with it.
I don't want to exercise my right to keep this forum open, but I do use it alot to keep track of my AH sales.. ( and I do post legitament posts to look for help on..)
If I see ppl post in this thread that contribute to this type of behaviour, I will make sure that a mod takes a look.
I'm washing my hands of this..
>< completely disgusted...( and I'm a family man.. and thinking that this is someone's daughter... C'mon???? really??)
I want this thread Locked and Deleted. This has no bearing on the game.
Ifrit.Haseyo
Server: Ifrit
Game: FFXI
Posts: 1755
By Ifrit.Haseyo 2009-01-22 11:23:13
xD Butter.
Server: Odin
Game: FFXI
Posts: 1304
By Odin.Dirtyfinger 2009-01-22 11:24:50
I am sorry if you have taken a particular offense to anyone contributing to this forum, but i highly doubt that this actually happened to the original OP so it was not to be taken so seriously.
As i said we were all young once, even you were, and you can say you would never have taken this lightly but i may disagree, and to some but not all there may be some amusement in this seeing as i'm sure it did not happen at all.
I doubt we will get our accounts removed as there are far worse topics with foul language which would take a priority, and i am going back to my original server/name so i could make this a flame war and not care (which i am not) I appreciate what you are saying but please don't take things so seriously, as i feel this was not intended to be taken in that manner.
Copied from another site~
ok this is what happening,
my parents are out with family friends, and theyll be back any minute so i need your help
see, i volunteer on my sister's softball team (im 22 the girls are 15)
and whatever, i met this girl, her name is Alison, and were going out for a while. We have a lot in common, and sometimes i help her with homework. i helped her with her english essay and she still got a D... this is because her teacher is a prick... anywayz
so she came over like an hour ago, and i really want to lose my virginity, so i ask her to have sex
"no no i cant, its not right" she said, but i told her "dont worry, i know what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus ill give you 2 n64 games if you say yes."
So then I gave her Diddy Kong Racing and Ken Griffy Jr. Baseball and we went up to my room. she is a bit confused and scared.
then i think to myself- yo i need lube, right? cuz i heard other people saying you need to lube up her clit otherwise it wont fit in properly.
ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my virginity, so i grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold and it wont melt, so i microwaved it for 8 minutes and i put it in a glass and poured it on her cooter, and now shes saying i burned it.
i dont know what to do, my parents are going to be back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz help you guys are really smart please help me.
any idea how to shut her up? should i give her another n64 game?
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